Let down

I don't know why I constantly do it but I always look for the best in people, and they never cease to constantly let me down. It's usually when I need them the most too. They brush me aside as if I mean nothing. Well, if you're going to do that then why even bother? oh right.. you don't. It shouldn't hurt but it does. To get your feelings walked on and all people do is dismiss them. You mean nothing to me, I'm going to ignore you and your feelings because THEY DONT MATTER. Yeah thanks.. actually I DO have feelings. I try to put everyone's feeling and wants and needs way before my own and I get nothing in return? Not even respect? thank you very much. It means a lot, really. I think it's funny how some people believe "what goes around comes around" and "good karma." THEY DO NOT EXIST. Don't get your hopes up because naturally people are selfish and don't take others into consideration. Thank you all, you wonderful people you!

Relationships

Relationships are so irritating. I mean I feel like they can obviously teach you a lot during high school but they're too distracting and stressful to get myself into. I want to be happy without one, and I'm slowly making that happen. High schools a growth period, sure you should have fun but it's more getting ready for situations in which you'll have to handle. I feel like relationships at this point are no longer for me. It's not what I'm looking for and whenever a related situation comes up it's super awkward because I just don't want to think about them. I don't need a relationship now and I'm almost better off without one. I want to be fully independent and I somewhat feel like having another person in your life like that would be a burden (well for now). I just want freedom right now, to be myself. I want to focus on me, no more of everyone else all the time.